Thursday, September 11, 2008

On days the earth stood still...

I have been alive for a few. My mother even more. From the advent of modern television there have been a few days that the earth just stood still. The death of Kennedy, the assassination attempt of Reagan, the Challenger Explosion, and of course 9/11.

They are days where you will always remember where you were. It is burned in your mind, as good as a stamp on time. Even as a small child (I was only in 1st grade watching Challenger), I remember watching the explosion and then, slowly, watching my teacher crumble to her seat and start crying. I don't even remember her name. But that moment is welded into my memory because of the momentous thing that happened.

On 9/11, 7 years ago, I had a 2 month old sweet baby girl. She was a baby I had waited for my whole life. A child born out of love, into a home where I was secure and married to a wonderful man. Alex woke up early just like any day... at just turned 5 years old, he was the sweetest little boy, bent on every ritual I had created for each day. Every day he would ask to watch a Blue's Clues on video and eat his daily snack of a nutrition bar with some instant breakfast. While the tv was occupying my older child, I would try to recover from the 24 times a night Cyan would wake to nurse and wake myself up with a shower so I could go on with my day. I was just stepping into the shower when my sister called from the East Coast. Bleary eyed and annoyed that someone would call so early, I answered... only to hear her upset and saying that I needed to find a television. Even then, we didn't get cable tv and she knew it. I called my neighbor, who also had a baby girl at the time (8mos) and got her to unlock her door so we could turn on her cable. We sat on her futon and watched as the second plane hit the two towers with horror. I clutched Cyan to me, and cried. I have never seen anything so awful.

It is strange to think that television has brought us together in that way. It has seemed like television has done nothing to bring us together as groups of people. It rips apart the ways we have lived for hundreds of years; trading meals together for meals hastily eaten in front of the tv. It has deconstructed things like leisure time playing golf, or hiking, or muddy football with friends to nearly obsolete. But these moments of tragedy, we share as a country... as a world.

My thoughts and prayers to everyone in my coutry... in the world... today.

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