Saturday, February 5, 2011

Taking care of my now littlest before my future littlest gets here

That's right folks. No baby yet! I am not online very often. I am not very comfortable right now and for some reason I keep getting sick! I think the babe is waiting (kindly) for me to be well before he makes his entrance. I have been puttering about, making projects... but oh so slowly. Very slowly. I have lots of plans that I can't get done, but more and more my puttering is paying off and I can check things off my "do before baby" list.

Logan has been having some emotional issues with the pregnancy lately. Not bad, he is just very touchy with everyone but me and has a really hard time with the answer 'no'. I have been focused on highlighting the things that make him special lately and it has started to work. It took longer than I wanted, but this last week I have seen some real changes in his behavior.

Last night I was getting some foam for a moses basket I am recovering and I saw these stuffed dogs. I am not normally a buyer of stuffed animals, they tend to breed under the beds and it always seems as though they are abused or just left on the floor. But these seemed the perfect size and shape for little hands and they had some weight to them. So I picked up one in each colorway.

When I got home, I presented Logan with the dogs. I told him that one was for him and one was for the baby, but since the baby can't take care of it yet Logan got to name them and take care of them for a while all by himself because he was the big brother. He ate it up. He picked the black and tan one and named it Shadow. He gave the baby the brown and white one and named it Brownie.

For the rest of the evening, Shadow and Brownie were sick. We took turns making sure they were getting their shots and checking their heart and pulse with Logan's play med kit. At bed time they both were wrapped in blankets on in the boys new beds and Logan has "called" me from his room (with an old broken cell) for me to check on them every few minutes.

Shadow is sicker than Brownie. He's needed lots of hugs and shots.

Logan loved the game and hugged me about 20 times. The baby's dog was included a lot. And he placed the dog in the baby's bed and was protective when Cyan came to check their hearts with the toy stethoscope.

The focus for a long time was on Logan's dog and what he needed. He needed his candle (LED) to have new batteries so he could sleep well while sick. He needed a blanket wrapped up around him. He needed cuddles. An extra book at bedtime (for which I picked Bernstein Bears "New Baby").

When Logan was ready for bed and tucked in, he started to talk with me. He said he was sorry for being so grumpy. He said that Shadow was too. He said sorry for yelling. I just hugged him and told him how wonderful and big he was getting and how proud I was. I was amazed that those thoughts (even though mumbled and not really about anything in particular) could come out of my brand new 4 yr old. He knows he hasn't been in a good mood. He knows that it hurts me. And for some reason, he was able to express his feelings more because of being able to speak through those toys. I have never used puppets to talk to my kids before. It is a psychological technique that always sort of wigged me out... but now I understand it way more. That is basically what he was doing. Each time Shadow was more sick than Brownie what he meant was "don't forget about me" and each time Brownie was taken care of and protected his actions were showing me that he knows that the baby is coming and that it's ok.

It was a beautiful evening. ♥




pink and green mama MaryLea said...

So sweet and such a good mama you are taking care of Logan's will be a big adjustment for him to give up his spot as the baby of the family. My "E" had a REALLY hard time with "C"s arrival and it rocked our whole household for almost a year, the fact that we ended up having to move and change schools within three months of her sister's arrival didn't help matters either. Sounds like you are right on track and following your best parenting instincts. Extra books, extra cuddles, and lots of positive reinforcement are how we got through it. xoxo
Thinking of you and your bump daily right now.


S B A said...

wow your good :O.. i like it..
it would be nice if you also would read my blog


Julie said...

A book Logan might enjoy is called "There's Going to be a Baby" by John Burningham & Helen Oxenbury. The illustrations alone are fab:)

Val in the Rose Garden said...

Thank you Julie. That sounds great. :) I put it on hold.

ML - Thank you for the thoughts. The last few weeks are always hard, but when you can't get well it makes it very frustrating.




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